Skip to main content

32 Weeks

Dear Aaron,

Happy 32 week Heaven Day peanut! Tonight daddy and I went to a meeting for the March of Dimes about Walk America. We're going to get a team together and do the walk in your memory this year. Talk about timing, it's on April 29th, one day after your birthday. They obviously do the walk the same weekend every year, because I can remember being in the hospital last year and seeing the commercials and a news story about the walk and about prematurity and sitting there just crying. I wish we could be doing this walk pushing you in the stroller telling people our success story, but I am just as proud to walk it as your mommy and make sure everyone knows all about you! We also took a tour of the NICU tonight. That was kind of interesting seeing a different NICU. Still brings those memories RIGHT back though. Seeing those tiny babies and remembering how small you really were. And speaking of those memories...we were visiting a new church again for the second time on Sunday and at the end of the service the pastor diverged from the bulletin and asked us to sing "Jesus Loves Me". That is one song I will never be able to sing without crying again. When I was pregnant I sang that to you EVERY day on my way to and from work several times (along with "You are My Sunshine" and once we knew you were a boy "Take me Out to the Ballgame"). After your were born, I would sing those songs to you and you would open your eyes and look right at me or squeeze my finger. Then of course we sang "Jesus Loves Me" at your memorial service. Every time I sing that song I cry, but I still have to try because I am singing it to you...every time...

I love you peanut! You are still and always will be my sunshine.

Millions of hugs and kisses,
Mommy

Labels

Labels:

Comments

Anonymous said…
keep on singing, Nikki! Aaron still loves to have you sing to him. Love, Mom
8:40 PM
Anonymous said…
hugs!
11:35 PM
Anonymous said…
Found your website through Dottie's. Just wanted to tell you how truly sorry I am for your loss. Your blog is beautiful and a testament to the love you have for your son. He was lucky to have felt it here on earth and lucky to continue to feel it in heaven. Just wanted to send peace to you in the upcoming new year.

Jennifer
12:50 AM
Anonymous said…
I also have followed your story through DWLZ and I wanted to say how sorry I am at the loss of your beautiful son. Your tributes to him on this website are truly one of most beautiful things that I have ever seen God Bless both of you and may each day bring you healing.

Laura
1:18 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Aaron didn't make it.

About 3 hours ago, Aaron passed away. After speaking with his doctors earlier in the last few weeks, we decided that if at any point they were no longer supporting Aaron's life, but instead preventing him from dying, that we didn't want him to suffer any longer. We reached that point this morning. Aaron had been struggling for life from Day One, and after surgery, and several weeks of fighting, Aaron ran out of strength. He fought hard, but the strain of surgery just proved to be too much for him. I'm sure I'll feel up to posting more information later. I just don't seem to have any energy left in me for relating this at the moment. But I did feel it was important to share this information with all of you who have been keeping tabs on us. Thank you for your concern, your prayers, and your well-wishes during this difficult time. We love you. P.S.: I'd like to leave you with the following lyrics that popped into my head while we held Aaron as he passed away. They ...
47 comments
Read more

IT WASN'T NEC!

After a long day of sitting at the hospital, hoping for the best, and preparing for the worst, the surgeon came in to talk to us and revealed to us that things went better than anyone could have possibly expected. Aaron never had an infection. What he did have though, was a hernia. He had a loop of intestine trapped beneath another loop, and while it was never "infected," it was trapped and deprived of blood, so it was dead. The surgeon removed the damaged loop, and thankfully, there is plenty more intestine left in there for Aaron. He's recovering peacefully from today's surgery, and was already at 28% oxygen (21% is room air) on the ventilator, and his other stats were all back where they were pre-surgery. He's doing fine. I want to thank everyone for their prayers and well-wishes during this time. I fully believe that Aaron wouldn't have rebounded from yesterday's procedure so quickly, and wouldn't have been as ready for today's if not for those...
25 comments
Read more

Status Quo*

* (asterisk denotes super-terrific happy news, but not the kind that involves massive amounts of urine) Everything is "as-is." I.E. as it has been. He's still not peeing, still high on the vent settings, and still in a very precarious situation. However...thanks to his tremendous nurse today, both DrummerWife and I were able to hold our little boy today. She took him out of the isolette completely in his bedding and set him into my lap. For 45 minutes, Aaron laid in my arms, and I talked to him, and cradled him, and cried over him. I've never been happier in my life than in the moments that Aaron was that close to me. He's beautiful, he's precious, and he's my boy. And no matter what happens, no one or no thing can ever take away the memories that I have of holding my son. I'm going to attach a number of photographs. Since my flickr account is completely maxed out for the month (until Thursday) I'm just uploading them here. If you want to download...
21 comments
Read more