Baby On Your Six



Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Letter to Aaron - June 27

Dear Aaron,

Hi peanut! I know I have not written to you (on here anyway) for about a month. This past month has gone incredibly quickly. I think that May was a very slow moving month for me and now it just feels like June is flying by. This summer is much different than last year. We didn't do much of ANYTHING last summer after about mid-June. I mean we went to the beach right after the funeral, but that afer that daddy and I just kind of did whatever we could to get by day to day. This year we can tell that we are healing. I am playing in the pit orchestra for a musical this summer and we're keeping busy. I am glad to know that we are healing, but at the same time it does make me sad sometimes. I have felt sad for so long that the healing that is taking place just does not feel normal (but I am adjusting). The one thing that is nice is that some of the sad memories are kind of being replaced by happier ones. I was thinking the other night about nights when Nurse Heather was on duty. When she was there and I would talk to you she would answer me for you. It was always kind of fun. She was the one that was on duty when you had the life-threatening phlegm wad (which for some reason will always make me giggle. Daddy and I have always said something like that would ONLY happen our child). The next night Heather was telling me the story and she said after the whole ordeal was over you just looked around around like, "Hey guys, what's going on?"

I've also been dreaming about you a lot lately which I always love. I like the feeling of being able to see you and especially talk and play with you. I hope that I never lose the ability to do that.

Well Mr. Aaron, I love you SO much and miss you even more. I will see you soon and very soon! Meet me in my dreams!

Hugs and kisses,
Mommy

XOXO

Can't let it go completely...

I saw Josh's last post and got a little sad. I am not sure I am willing to let this site just go away...not yet anyway. I have actually been writing letters to Aaron on a (mostly) weekly basis. I just have not been posting them. For some reason when a year came (and went) I just figured people might be tired of it or sometimes I felt like it was expected. It was SO healing for me to write letters and share them with you all. Your comments are always so nice to read as well...like I said I figured at the one year mark we were kind of expected to get over it. After a couple recent conversations I have had with my mother, mother-in-law and Josh I realize that this is not the case. I would like to keep posting. I don't think it will be every week, maybe not even every other. But It will probably still be a couple times a month. I also appreciate the support and all the continued support. We are healing and it is good, but sometimes healing can be a bit scary as well. I have a letter I have been working on for this week. When I finish it up I will post it either today or tomorrow.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Long time, no post...

Well, if there's anyone out there still reading this after nearly one month of BoYS silence...Hi. We're still alive. Everything is good.

If you're wondering why there hasn't been any posts from either DrummerWife or myself in the last several weeks, well, the answer is pretty simple: there haven't NEEDED to be any posts from DrummerWife or myself. We're doing well. Life's not perfect, but it's better. We're healing.

A big thank-you to everyone who's been there for us in thought, word, or deed in the last year+. I don't know if there will ever be another post here at Baby On Your Six, or if there will be an occasion that warrants another post. But thank you for being here with us since this whole ride started. :)