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Tears, Tears, Tears...and Taco Bell

So, last night was just about the strangest night DrummerWife and I have had in quite a while. It started off with DrummerWife deciding that she had a hankering for Taco Bell. Her first real craving, and it was for Taco Bell.

So, DrummerWife and I made an ill-fated run for the border. We get to Taco Bell, and order our cut-rate pseudo-Mexican food. We eat said food, and almost immediately, we're both deeply regretting the decision to eat at the 'Bell.'

Well, sick to our stomachs, and barely fed, we decide to head back home. And that's when the worst radio commercial in the history of radio commercials came on. It dealt with some sensitive material, but opened itself up to a virtual treasure trove of jokes. One of which I very nearly made, except for the fact that I realized that saying the words that I was about to say would probably drive DrummerWife, in her pregnant, overly-emotional state right into tear-filled hysterics.

Okay, fine. I didn't say it. We're fine, right? Oh hell no. I was dumb enough to say "I could say something really funny and offensive right now, but I'm not going to." Oh yeah. That was smart.

It was about that point that DrummerWife burst into tears. And not just "tears." We're talking snot-firing, saline-pouring, clutching-for-oxygen tears. So, picture the scene - we're driving in the car. I've NOT said something potentially offensive to prevent tears, and now DrummerWife is crying. So, I could have said it and made her cry, or I could have not said it, and still made her cry. I couldn't win.

Yes, I realize the crucial error came when I said that I could say something really offensive and funny, but I wasn't going to. I accept that. But holy crap...that was a weird, weird situation.

I've learned my lesson, however. I'm just not talking for the next 22 weeks. :)

Comments

Anonymous said…
Oh baby,it was like the "Who's on First" routine - only with tears instead of laughter - it was rediculous. But please don't stop talking for the next 22 weeks, I would miss your humor that mostly makes me laugh - but every now and then (thanks to the peanut) makes me cry. Plus, if you just quit talking what would you have to write about :) I love you!
Anonymous said…
Maybe you should continue speaking with your wife, but throw those comments toward someone who appreciates them, like your brother or father.

Tell DrummerWife, I can identify.

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